When Greg Chalmers won the Barracuda Championship in July of 2016, he ended the PGA TOUR’s longest active streak without a win.

But, for those 385 tournaments the Australian native played in and didn’t win, don’t think he wasn’t celebrating on the side.

Greg, Max (center), and Lachlan ready to tee off. Photo by Maggie McDonald

You see, Chalmers and his wife, Nicole, rejoice in life’s little victories. That’s because their oldest son, Max, 13, has autism, and when he does things like make eye contact and say, “How was your day?” those are fist-pump worthy moments in the Chalmers’ household.

“A milestone a typical child hits might be a mountain for a child who falls on the autism spectrum,” Greg said. “Nothing is taken for granted.”

With the family’s deep appreciation for what many parents would consider “normal,” they’re also leading the charge when it comes to helping other families affected by autism in their Dallas-Fort Worth community.

A Different Kind of Parenting

Greg and Nicole Chalmers first met in their early 20s in Australia thanks to a mutual friend who believed they would be perfect for one another.

“My friend told me, ‘He’s a nice quiet boy who likes to play golf and read,'” Nicole explained. “I said, ‘Thank you, but I think I’m okay.’ She said that for seriously four or five years. Then one day, out of the blue, I got a call from Greg and he asked if I’d like to meet for lunch. I said ‘yes,’ just so I could tell my friend we finally met.”

They hit it off, got married and moved to the U.S. in 1999 so Greg could pursue his career on the PGA TOUR.

Then they had their first child, Max. He was healthy at birth and hit his age appropriate milestones until he was 15 months old. After that is when Greg and Nicole noticed his behavior was different from other infants.

Nicole with Max and Lachlan. Photo c/o Nicole Chalmers

“He was stimming, which is self-stimulating behavior,” Greg said. ‘He would get really excited when he would watch videos like “Thomas the Tank,” and kind of shake and clench his fist, or his mouth would get all tense. He still does that when he gets overstimulated.”

After much testing, Max was officially diagnosed with autism at 22 months old.

“It was devastating. I think because we didn’t really know what that meant back then. We had no I idea what was in store,” Nicole said. “Would he ever be verbal? Would he ever communicate?”

The Chalmers family walked away from the doctor’s office with very little information about their son’s new diagnosis. The hospital offered to put them on a long waiting list to see a behavioral therapist, and told them to start speech therapy right away. So, Nicole did her own deep dive into the condition and took the treatment reins herself.

“I like to say Nicole has a PhD in what our son needs,” Greg said. “She determines what behavioral therapies, speech therapies and diets we need to try. What she does is a full-time job.”

Greg and Nicole quickly learned that what works for one child with autism doesn’t mean it’s going to work for the next. But, the thing they encourage all families to do is set the bar high.

“I read something years ago from another mother whose child falls on the autism scale, and she said, ‘If I had to go back and do it again, I would expect more because these kids are extremely capable.’ So, I tired to follow that mindset,” Nicole said.

And Max is better off for it.

“To look at him, he seems quite a typical child, but he’s been through years and years of treatment, and he’s actually responded well to everything, which is why he’s so high functioning today,” Nicole said.

Meet Max Chalmers

He may have not said his first word until he was three-and-half years old, but Max is highly intelligent. He’s in AP classes in a mainstream school, and even won his class’ math award.

Max poses with his math award. Photo c/o Nicole Chalmers

“He has a photographic memory so he does very well in school,” Nicole explained.

Socially, it’s more of a struggle, however.

“He has trouble with social cues, sarcasm and jokes, but he’s learning,” Greg said. “He’s starting to pick up on the inflection of voices.”

Like his father, Max is an athlete. Rather than golf, however, it’s football, all the time. He finished his first season on the gridiron, playing on the seventh-grade ‘B’ team as a nose guard and nose tackle.

“The team got 10 sacks on the season and I think Max got seven of them himself,” Greg said. “He’s very strong. He does wrestling, jui-jitsu and martial arts, and he’s about a year away from getting his black belt. So, he’s good at moving people around.”

He’s also good at giving his parents a chuckle every once in a while, because his thinking is so “black and white.”

“He always likes to give me advice out on the golf course, and that’s where his bluntness comes through,” Greg said. “A couple of years ago, I hit a shot and I didn’t hit it hard enough. He walked right up to me and said, ‘Dad, that was nice, but next time, just make sure to hit it a little bit harder.'”

Then there was the time Max asked his dad if he has any goals. Greg told him he’d like to win more tournaments on the PGA TOUR, including a major.

“Max goes, ‘Remind me how old you are, Dad.’ I said, ‘I’m 43, mate.’ Then Max says, ‘Yeah, you could be running out of time.'”

Max, the hard-hitting lineman, with Greg and Nicole. Photo c/o Nicole Chalmers

And Nicole has stories of her own, too.

“One time, Max came home and said, ‘Hey, good news. You’re a trophy wife! Would you like to know the criteria?’ He goes, ‘Well, they often drive a nice car, which you do. They go to the gym a lot, which you do. They have a dad who earns all the money, which is true because you don’t have a job.’ I said, ‘You know, there are some people who might find that term a little bit offensive.’ He said, ‘But why? It means you’re so fortunate.’ I had no comeback.”

What Max doesn’t quite realize is his mom has a job, not only raising him and his younger brother, Lachlan, but as the head of Maximum Chances, the family’s charity which offers support to other families affected by autism spectrum disorders.

Giving Others a Maximum Chance

Nicole and Greg started Maximum Chances nine years after Max was originally diagnosed. Before they officially launched the organization, however, they were helping others out of their own pocket.

Their goal in starting the foundation was to help local families gain access to some of the therapies and treatments that have been so beneficial to Max, such as behavioral therapy, speech therapy, biomedical treatment, and even equestrian therapy. They also help fund testing and doctors’ visits.

“The way we have it set up is we pay the provider. The family who uses us has to make a small co-pay, just so we can make sure they’re fully invested in what they’re doing, and they’ll show up for the appointments,” Greg explained.

The Chalmers family absorbs as much of the cost as possible so that each dollar that comes in is funneled directly to other families for treatment.

Max and Lachlan with Greg’s Maximum Chances bag. Photo by Maggie McDonald

Maximum Chances’ biggest fundraiser of the year is their golf tournament each Memorial Day weekend, just after North Texas’ back-to-back PGA TOUR tournaments, the AT&T Byron Nelson and the DEAN & DELUCA Invitational.

“Greg doesn’t get any sleep at all,” Nicole said. “I feel bad because he plays in both tournaments. I think he woke up at 4:00 a.m. the day of our tournament because we don’t have a staff running it. He was nervous and wanted to make sure we had all the details completed.”

But, that’s the kind of effort Greg believes other families deserve.

Golf as ‘Just a Tool’

The thing about Greg and Nicole is they the highest hopes for Max. They believe he will eventually go to college, maintain a full-time job and live independently.

“I think there will be more difficult speed bumps along the way, but we’re confident in his ability to slowly adapt to new situations,” Nicole said.

With all of their family back in Australia, Greg and Nicole have navigated autism and all of its wonderful and frustrating quirks thanks to a strong network of friends and support groups.

“It’s definitely a long journey, but it helps to rely on those around you,” Nicole said. “That’s how we were able to keep hope that Max was going to do better than we originally hoped.”

As for Greg’s advice to other families who are new to handling a child with autism?

Photo by Maggie McDonald

“Don’t panic. There is a future,” he said. “It may seem overwhelming right now, but start getting involved in a community of parents who are on the same page as you, and begin trying new therapies with your child, without hurting them. It’s baby steps.”

And it’s that measured approach that aids Chalmers on TOUR also.

“We all need that little reminder of what really matters at times,” he said. “Not to say that golf doesn’t matter, but it’s just a tool to pay the bills. It’s a great job and I love it, but it’s not the most important thing in my life.”

His family is. And that’s worth celebrating each and every day.